A Sadistic Baby Arrives
by UnaQ
Summary: Kagura receives a little surprise two days before her anniversary with her sadistic husband and the whole of edo prepares for the worst. /OkiKagu/ /Rated for language, possible content/
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer- I do not own Gintama or the characters**

* * *

**_A sadistic baby arrives- chapter one_  
**

_More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.  
- Doug Larson_**_  
_**

* * *

Kagura had been married to Okita Sougo for one year. It was a year full of city damage, many verbal fights, several injured people who made the mistake to hit on one of them and many many tears shed by the whole of Edo.

Regardless, Okita and Kagura were as happy as ever, although they expressed their feelings in a strange way.

Okita had proposed to Kagura on her nineteenth birthday, It was very awkward considering her overprotective dad Umibozu, was present. After a long and heated battle between an angry bald Yato and a sadistic captain, their marriage was approved.

Their wedding was not much better, maybe even worse, for all of the Shinsengumi officers were holding back three of Kagura's 'dads'.

Now that a year had passed, Okita and Kagura were planning their anniversary. It was only two days away when Kagura received a little surprise.

* * *

Kagura Okita had woken up that morning to find her husband getting ready for his job. Early mornings were a common occurrence within the Okita household, being the Shinsengumi's captain required a lot of work.

"Mmm Sadist, It's cold, come back here and warm me up." Kagura mumbled in protest as she shifted in their futon.

"Do you want me to screw you that badly?" With that comment he received a kick to his side.

"Keep dreaming."

Okita just smirked and leaned down to his alien wife who was now mumbling something about chocolate, "Anyway China, I gotta go, but I'll be back tonight to fulfill your request."

And with that he kissed his half asleep wife on her forehead and quietly left, but not before he placed an alarm clock set to go off in one minute a little too close to her ear.

That morning the sound of ringing and an angry Yato women screaming were heard.

* * *

The door to Yorozuya Gin-chan opened and a very annoyed vermilion haired girl entered with a sour expression. She walked into the living room with her over-sized white dog and sat down on the available couch.

"Ohayou, Kagura-chan." Shinpachi greeted as he vacuumed the floor.

Gintoki however, who was across from her on the other couch, remained silent while reading his newest issue of JUMP.

"Gin-chan you bastard, greet the cute as hell girl who just entered your home." Kagura said with obvious annoyance in her tone.

"Mmm, whatever."

Suddenly a purple parasol tore the JUMP away from his hand and it was sent flying to the ceiling. "No, not whatever! It's rude to ignore me!"

"KAGURA! WHAT WAS THAT FOR! JESUS GOOD MORNING, OKAY?"

The orange-haired girl just sat back down and rested her head in an attempt to catch up on sleep she missed that morning due to her sadistic husband.

Everything was peaceful until Kagura's stomach made a weird noise.

The two men looked at her with a deadpanned expression for the contents of their fridge were about to be devoured.

"Gin-chan, what do you have for food?" Kagura said as she held her stomach and scrunched up her face.

"No, no, no, no! Kagura! Having a wealthy husband means you don't eat our food anymore!" Gintoki said as he ran toward his supply of strawberry milk in an attempt to shield it from her sight.

"Gin-san, Okita-san isn't that rich." Shinpachi said with a bored expression.

"Gin-chan! I neeeeeeeeed foooood!" Kagura said as she rolled onto her stomach and punched the couch.

"Kagura-chan, we don't have much here."

Kagura looked up, her face suddenly had a green tinge, "Megane! I don't feel good, I think I'm gonna-"

But the alien girl didn't finish her sentence as she emptied the contents of her stomach on Shinpachi.

"WHY ME? KAGURA-CHAN! HOW MUCH DID YOU EAT!"

"Gin-chan, Megane, I feel weird," Kagura complained as she laid back on the couch and held her forehead.

"Kagura-chan! What happened?" Shinpachi cried as he rushed to the vermilion haired girl's side soon followed by a concerned perm head.

"I-I don't know, all of a sudden I f-feel sick."

"Gin-san, what do we do?" Shinpachi screeched, if Okita-san found out about this it would be trouble.

"Ah, ah! Patsuan! You're sister!" Gintoki half smiled.

"Eh?"

* * *

Gintoki and Shinpachi took Kagura to the Shimura dojo. And Otae immediately set out a spare futon for the sick amanto.

"What is wrong, Kagura-chan?" Otae asked worried as she placed a damp towel on the said girl's forehead.

"A-anego, I do not know. This morning I was fine but all of a sudden I got sick."

"Hm, Gin-san, Shin-chan, you go tell Okita-san about this, okay?"

Both men looked up and nervously fidgeted as they sweated. But followed the girls actions when she sent a demonic glare at them.

After the two left Otae went back to nursing the pale girl.

"How do you feel Kagura-chan?"

Kagura shifted in her futon, "Anego? My boobs hurt."

* * *

Meanwhile, Gintoki and Shinpachi were stuck with the task of telling an overprotective and very dangerous husband that her wife had suddenly fell ill.

They walked nervously through the Shinsengumi barracks in silence, until they finally reached the sadistic captain's room.

Even though he and Kagura had moved into a shared apartment and stayed there each night Kondo had insisted on keeping Okita's room.

When they entered the sand coloured man immediately noticed their presence and grabbed his katana for preparation.

"Danna, Megane, why are you here?" He deadpanned as he stuck another needle into a straw doll.

Gintoki nudged Shinpachi who looked up with a frantic face obviously not wanting to deliver the news.

"Well?" Okita said with an annoyed face.

"Ano, Okita-san," Shinpachi began, "You see, Kagura-san she, um, well, this morning, her-"

Suddenly a katana was held against Shinpachi's throat.

"Shinpachi-kun, want to tell me what happened clearly?" Okita said with a sudden serious tone.

* * *

"ANEGOOOOOO!" Kagura cried as she flung open the bathroom door and ran toward to woman drinking tea.

"Kagura-chan, what did it say?" Otae stood up trying to calm the frantic amanto down.

Kagura held up the stick to Otae showing her the plus sign, "Are you sure these things work on a Yato? I mean are you positive!" She managed to say through breathes.

"Of course, we bought it from an amanto store."

"So what does this mean?"

Otae looked at the naive girl before her and smiled.

"Well, Kagura-chan, it means your pregnant."

Kagura paled and she sat down to in an attempt to stable herself.

_Pregnant?!  
_

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**Authors note- Okay, so I started a new fanfiction. Please tell me if you like it and if I should continue it, much appreciated :-)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer- I do not own Gintama or the characters.  
**

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_**A Sadistic Baby Arrives- Chatper two  
**_

_"I know that something very strange has happened to my brain. I'm either feelin' very good or else I am insane."_

_— __Mike Nesmith, Sweet Young Thing_

* * *

In the end Gintoki and Shinpachi's lives were spared, but only after they recieved a katana up their asses.

Okita had left as soon as Shinpachi told him the news, most likely on his way home to find his michevious ill wife.

They just hoped that Edo would survive.

* * *

Okita opened the door to his home and immediately went into the bedroom. But inside his futon he didn't see his wife like he had expected.

"China?" He called as he searched each room of the house, growing more worried by the second.

And why wouldn't he be worried? His suddenly ill wife, who had no where else to go, was not at home.

He was just about to leave and conduct a search for the amanto, when he heard the front door slide open. Okita grabbed his katana just in case and slowly walked to the front of his house, only to find a very pale girl wrapped up in a blanket.

"China! Where the hell have you been?!" He sighed, obviously relieved as he went to her side and pulled her into a hug.

"Shutup, you sadist! I was with Anego." Kagura mumbled as she accepted the hug, wrapping her cold hands under his Shinsengumi jacket.

"China, you're freezing! What is wrong with you?" Concerned filled his voice, as he tried to pick up his wife, only to be stopped with a punch to the arm.

"I am fine, I can walk you know," She said annoyed as her husband helped her into their bedroom.

"You should be nicer to your concerned husband."

"Concerned, my ass cheek! Anyway, do not worry, I am not sick."

He looked up at her as she climbed into their futon, obvious confusion radiated from his face.

"Then why are you so cold? And why did Megane tell me you threw up everywhere this morning?"

"I am cold because I just walked over here at night! Oh, about that, I, um,"

"Out with it, China doll."

She looked away from his stare and snuggled into the blanket, rolling onto her side and covering her face with the covers.

"Chinaaaa," He whined as he too got inside the futon and attempted to roll her over.

"Tell me!" He said as he wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her neck, while his other hand played with her hair.

She couldn't help but giggle when he placed a small kiss on her cheekbone, and Okita smirked in relief, "So you are alive China?"

"Shutup! I won't die until I've killed you!" She sniffed, still facing away.

"Are you going to tell me?" Okita mumbled into her skin as his hand traveled further down her body, "Or do I have to punish you for keeping a secret from me?"

She shuddered under his touch and suppressed a small moan.

"O-okay, but don't be mad."

Her voice was so soft and timid it made Okita stop his actions, slowly she turned in his arms and he could see her flustered face. He didn't know if it was from his actions or her announcement she was about to make.

"I-I'm," She stuttered as she looked down at the pillow.

Okita raised a brow, "Come on China, what is so hard about saying you have the flu?"

She looked up with a fire in her eyes, "I don't have the flu you idiot sadist! I am pregnant!"

Silence fell in the room as both realized what Kagura had said.

"Oh," Kagura squeaked and shifted in the futon again in an attempt to escape the awkwardness.

But before she could get out of the futon, two arms pulled her back in and into a warm and comforting embrace.

"Why would I be mad about that China? Do you really think that low of me?" Okita said, finally he had processed the news and couldn't help but let out a genuine smile.

"Well I didn't know, okay? It's really scary." She mumbled into his chest, slightly closing her eyes and inhaling his familiar scent.

He leaned down place a meaningful kiss on her small pink lips, to which she accepted.

"It's alright China, Hijikata won't stand a chance against once he is born."

"Why is it a he? I want a baby girl!" Kagura pouted

"Don't be picky, China. I will be happy regardless."

Kagura smiled before returning his earlier kiss, she had felt relief and joy now that her sadistic husband knew the news, and that he was happy.

"You better buy me some good food now that I have an excuse."

"Don't push your luck, China." Okita yawned, before he snuggled into her neck.

"Night stupid Sadist, have sweet nightmares." Kagura smiled before she closed her eyes and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

Okita just mumbled a reply before he too drifted off.

* * *

Meanwhile, Otae had told Shinpachi and Gintoki the news and they were now preparing their coffins.

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**Authors note- I hope my attempt at OkiKagu fluff was good! No sexy times but I will probably add some more in later chapters because I am a perv. Please tell what you thought!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer- I do not own Gintama or the characters.**

**Authors notes- Thank you to everybody who has favourited, followed or reviewed! I hope you like this chapter and I am sorry for the late update as I just finished all my exams :)  
**

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**_A Sadistic Baby Arrives- Chapter three_**

_Let us make pregnancy an occasion when we appreciate our female bodies. _

_-Merete Leonhardt-Lupa_

* * *

"Don't tell me you are still mad." Okita whined as he followed his wife inside their house.

When she didn't respond he took the hint. Okay, maybe she had the right to be angry at him, but not for this long.

"So I made a little joke China. Why are you still angry?" He questioned as he sat under their kotatsu, watching her angrily stomp around the house attempting to remove her shoes.

She scoffed and finally removed her boot, things took a little longer to get done with her belly in the way. "A little joke? You told the waitress that I was your obese child! Did you really think that would get us a discount?"

Okita suppressed a laugh as he recalled that evening, "I was just trying to save a little cash, your pregnancy cravings aren't that simple to handle you know."

She shot him a glare and walked into their bedroom, slamming their Shoji and groaning in frustration as she tried to remove her clothes.

Her husband soon followed and opened the doors to see his alien wife laying on the futon with both her legs in the air, screaming in defeat.

"Do you need help with that, China?" He smirked

Kagura rolled up and slowly rose to her feet, all the while glaring daggers at her sadistic husband. "You jerk sadist, you are enjoying this!"

"I am not."

"I can tell! Do you think I've been spending the last seven months not noticing your sadistic grin as you watch me try to move around with this thing in me!"

Maybe she had a point, these past seven months he had the tendency to watch her battle with her bulging stomach. Although during some of their fights she did use it as a weapon against him.

Kagura's pregnancy had been a blessing and a curse to Okita Sougo. On one hand she a lot of hormones and he was receiving an increase of sex. But on another she was a raging and hungry balloon who needed a constant supply of weird food combinations.

Okita also had to make sure she didn't go out and do dangerous things, although he was against it regardless of her pregnancy. He also had to restrain from fighting back with her when she turned things physical, which she tended to do daily.

Kagura was also really sensitive and she started crying over the craziest of things. Okita hated her tears and he would do almost anything to stop them, which she took advantage of. He often thought that she just cried to see him perform stupid dances in order to cheer her up.

Despite the horny side of her pregnancy, he had become increasingly protective of her ever since the doctor told him about the risks of a Yato cross human baby.

* * *

"_Mr and Mrs Okita, please come in and have a seat." A doctor greeted them as the couple almost laughed at his greeting._

"_How is everything? Is little Akira okay?" Kagura asked, leaning forward with an anxious look for emphasis._

"_You two already have a name? That's lovely." The doctor smiled._

"_No, we are not calling him Akira. China here wants a girl and I want a boy, so for now we chose a unisex name to refer him too." Okita deadpanned._

"_Stop calling her a him!" The Chinese girl said as he stood on his foot._

"_Regardless of that, there is some news I should share with you."_

_The couple nodded and paid attention as a heavy aura filled the room._

"_Well, Yato pregnancy cycles are like any other but in this case were the baby is half Yato and half human, there can be complications."_

"_What complications." Okita growled._

"_Well, the Yato blood is quiet strong and dominant, and there will be a process where the fetus has to combine his Yato blood with his human. It will be quiet painful for you Mrs. Okita and it could happen without warning. There are also several risks involved, if you are not strong enough for it their could be life threatening risks for you and your unborn baby."_

_The room was quiet as the couple processed the information. So far they thought the pregnancy was perfectly normal, but upon hearing this they began to panic._

"_What do you mean life threatening risks for her!?" Okita yelled as his small wife gripped onto his hand._

"_If Kagura's systems are not healthy enough, she could well-"_

"_Die. I could die." Kagura said softly as she stared at the floor, tears forming in her ocean blue eyes._

"_Don't be stupid China! I won't let you die! How could you even say that, as if you could lose to a tiny baby!" Okita shouted with a painful look on his face as he intertwined their fingers._

"_Do not worry to much, I am just stating the worst scenario. Everything has been fine so far Mrs Okita, your' baby is perfectly healthy."_

* * *

Ever since that appointment whenever Kagura would even wince Okita was at her side and worriedly asking if she was alright.

He couldn't help it. Kagura was the last thing he had left in his life, and she was the only thing he could call family.

He didn't know what would happen if she left.

But he tried to push all thoughts out of his head and be optimistic for his wife.

"China, everything is out of love." Okita smirked at his wife who was now pulling at the zipper on her dress.

"Would you help me?" She grunted, as she bent in an awkward squat and attempted to pull at the tiny zipper.

Okita walked over and pulled down her zipper, kissing her back as he went.

"Are you seriously trying to get into my goods after your little joke." Kagura said as she suppressed a moan.

"Please China, I bet your hormones are going crazy right now." Okita smirked into her skin as his hand travelled to her front and pulled down her bra, tracing his fingers over the sensitive flesh.

"I need to shower." Kagura muttered before her body could give in to his touches.

"Me too, nice idea."

"No! I can't, I-I-"

Okita just proceeded with his actions and completely ripped of her dress and bra, leaving her almost naked. Her stood behind her and kissed her neck while one of his hands played with her breast and the other travelled down to her waist.

"I'm obese."

"..."

Okita stopped and his eyes narrowed in surprise and confusion. He would of laughed if he didn't see his small wife's face, stained with tears.

"China?" He asked as he spun her around in his arms, "What's wrong? What happened?"

"Y-you sa-said, "She managed to say between small sobs, "t-that I-I was o-o-obese."

"China! I didn't mean it! I was being a sadistic jerk, you should know that!"

"B-but if I-I'm o-o-obese y-you w-won't find m-me a-attractive any-anymore."

Guilt spread over him and he recalled the hurt and angry expression his wife had at their dinner earlier that night when he had made that comment. Seeing her tears and her small frame shake from her cries was eating at him, he didn't want her to cry from it!

"China.." He mumbled as he led into their shower and turned on the water so it was the perfect temperature, "You are an idiot."

She didn't protest as he washed her tears away with his hands and moved the faucet over her neck and hair.

"Of course I find you attractive, China." He reassured her as she pulled her hair away from her face and kissed her jawline. "Otherwise It wouldn't hurt for me to walk around."

"W-why does i-it hurt?" Kagura whimpered.

The he took her hand and placed in on his aroused family jewel.

"Oh." She smiled and pulled him into the shower and closed the screen door.

"China!? My clothes are still on!" Okita complained as he felt the water run down his coat.

"Not for long." Kagura grinned as she turned to face her husband with a look filled with lust.

"Oh."

* * *

**Authors notes- I AM SORRY THAT IT TURNED INTO SHOWER SEX I CAN'T HELP ITTTTTT! I hope you liked this chapter, please tell me your thoughts! The next one might be a little sadder. **


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